David and I got back from Seattle on Sunday night, and it was a crazy week!  From the moment we touched ground in Seattle, cell phones were on and work issues continually demanded our attention. This came in very handy as the chatty woman sitting next to David kept handing him small bottles of vodka to open during the flight.  “Grandma likes you” and “Grandma needs help opening this” she’d slur, waving the bottle of Smirnoff in his direction.  Nothing says “I’d prefer to be quiet” more than focusing intently on your cell phone.  Never mind that it was a game of “Angry Birds”.

Even though I was raised before the internet existed, I can’t imagine what business trips would be like without it.  Answering office emails, adding appointments to my calendar and registering last-minute workshop participants are some of the amazing things that I can do right on my cell phone.  It’s exciting to be a mobile office, and makes me feel incredibly productive!  Cell phones make traveling a joy, as I simply click a button to find great restaurants in the area and never feel like I am lost.

After returning on Sunday from an amazing trip, I was pooped and all “talked out”.  I promised myself a full Monday of not being logged in to the world.  Yet as I groggily poured myself a cup of coffee, my natural reflex was to pick up the laptop, plop down on the couch and check in.  Within minutes I was fully absorbed – emails to answer, bills to pay, “urgent” news to read and more.  Kirstie Alley danced the cha-cha on “Dancing with the Stars”?  Tell me more!

Even though I told myself that I was going to disconnect and have a day off, there was a part of me that craved my digital connections.  After surfing the web for several hours, I didn’t feel rested at all.  I had to take a moment and acknowledge that this was all my making.  As a self-employed person, no one asks me to count how many hours I spend “researching” on the internet.  If I want to take a day off, it’s my say.  But I couldn’t seem to do it, and I know that I’m not the only one.  I have friends that I gently make fun of who can’t survive a meal without grabbing their phone every time it beeps or vibrates.  In Los Angeles it is VERY common for someone to answer a call mid-conversation, and carry on right at the table.  They usually explain that this call from their agent/publicist/florist is urgent.

In that moment I forced myself to disconnect, and the best way to do this was to get out of the house.  I quickly threw on some clothes.  Bernie our dog can always sense when we are going on a hike;  He starts walking in circles and wagging his tail.  Dogs are always supportive of your disconnecting from the outside world, because it means that they will get to connect with you instead.

I grabbed the keys and Bernie’s leash, and mindlessly slid my iphone into my pocket.  Now, I am using the term “hike” loosely; I am going on a 45 minute walk in Fryman Canyon.  Parts of the hike are sloped, but I am more likely to see Ray Romano than a mountain lion.  I won’t get lost.  And there really is no reason for me to have my iphone.  Yet, I want it with me.

A little shocked that I couldn’t go one hour without being accessible, I pulled the iphone out of my pocket and left it on the kitchen counter.  As we drove to our hike, thoughts swirled in my head.  What if my agent called because I got a new book deal?  What if the Oprah Show called and they needed me on a plane within the hour?  It’s her last season people, and she’s on my vision board for a reason!  What if my sister Tarrin called because there was a funny story to tell?  What-if-what-if-what-if?  My body and mind are so used to being accessible at all times that I had anxiety over a 60 minute break.

As we made our way through Fryman canyon I practiced deep breathing.  I looked around and noticed a patch of wildflowers, with their vibrant pinks and yellows.  I saw the snow-capped mountains in the distance.  David picked a handful of wild sage and handed it to me, which smelled incredibly fragrant.  I felt connected, in the right way.  I felt happy.  I had no phone to check and actually liked not being reachable.

As much as I like to think that my life is filled with super-important meetings and tasks that demand my instant attention, I didn’t miss a single urgent call or email on that hike.  I did however, feel happier and more centered.  I am making a new daily routine, that for at least one hour a day I will disconnect from technology and connect to myself.  I can meditate, cook, take a hike, read, stare at the wall, anything.  But for that hour there will be no phone, TV, computer, or texting.  Just me and my bliss.  So I ask you, when was the last time you disconnected?