A little over ten years ago, I had the opportunity to co-host a late-night talk show on television. This adventure came as a surprise but wasn’t a total shock.

I’ve always been chatty and try to bring a lighthearted sense of humor to my intuitive sessions.

I also have a strong desire to empower people to improve their lives.

Over time, I had been a guest on a bunch of TV shows and news segments to teach about spirituality as well as psychic intuition. I also hosted a live radio show where I gave readings and intuitive advice for callers. I interviewed guests from various fields on that radio show, and it aired in several cities around the US.

My husband David took some of my guest appearances and edited them into a TV reel that he posted on YouTube. And wouldn’t you know it, that video ended up being seen by a TV producer who wanted me to audition for a live call-in talk show about sex and relationships.

I thought, why not? This is a great opportunity for me to teach and hopefully help people connect with their own intuition.

I went in for the audition and had fun doing test shows with the other potential hosts. We joked around and laughed a lot. It must have gone well, because I was soon offered the job! At the time, I was thrilled at the prospect of releasing some of the pain points that come with self-employment.

For the first time in my life, I wouldn’t have to think about managing my own budget or marketing. Booking guests wasn’t my responsibility, and someone else would be in charge of the schedule.

Honestly, it seemed glamorous too. As soon as we stepped on set, a PA (production assistant) was assigned to us who would get us anything we needed. Basically this meant that they’d bring us coffee or water from the craft services table if we asked, which seemed very exciting after years of working independently.

There was a wardrobe budget, and a stylist who chose my daily outfit from a color-coordinated rack of choices that had been hand-selected for me.

Sounds like a dream job, right?

But in retrospect, I’m surprised to admit that I hated it.

I remember doing a test show where producers stood behind the cameras, giving us feedback on our chemistry and the pace of the show.
I could hear people on the set commenting on my hairstyle, my face, and my overall appearance.

Suddenly, I heard a voice call out from behind the lights. “Dougall, remember that you have 30-60 seconds to give each reading. Also, stop saying ‘I feel.’ We only want the therapist to say that.”

“But, why?” I said out of confusion.

The producers explained that since we were a panel show with different strengths, everyone needed to focus on their specific role. Apparently, I sounded too much like a therapist.

“Well, what should I say instead of ‘I feel? How about ‘I sense?’” I asked.

“We only want you to say ‘I see…’ Remember, you’re a psychic, so you see things, you don’t feel them.”

For nearly twenty years, as an empath and sensitive person, I had connected intuitively with thousands of clients, saying “I feel this about you” or “I sense this about a situation.” Now I was being directed on how to speak.

I had projected so much onto this opportunity, thinking it was the best thing for my career and that it would boost my confidence. Ironically, it made me feel more self-conscious than ever. But I’m a team player, so I made the adjustments they asked for as quickly as possible.

While the show was airing, I came to the set one day wearing a red plaid shirt that I really liked. I told the stylist that it made me feel confident and I wanted to wear it. After getting my hair and makeup done, I sat down in my seat on stage under the lights, ready to go live.

I heard another voice say from behind the lights, “Dougall, please go back to wardrobe and put on a sweater and a collared shirt.”

“But I like this shirt,” I said.

“It’s a great shirt, but it looks like you’re going to a BBQ.”

My co-host, who was next to me wearing a blazer and tie, laughed and said he had asked if he could wear a sweater on the show that night. He was told, “Only Dougall wears sweaters.”

Not only did we have specific verbs and adjectives we could each use, but we also had a specific look.

Here’s the thing: I did enjoy aspects of my time on that show and was grateful for the opportunity. I also understand that a TV show has to have a certain look, and I learned a lot about how to quickly deliver my insights as an intuitive on a national platform.

What was new to me was that I was no longer in control.

My ego wanted the validation of being on a TV show, of being well-known. I was also certain that if I got a TV show, I would make more money. But ironically, the year I had that opportunity, I actually had a significant drop in income because I didn’t have the time to do live events or give private sessions.

So many of the fantasies I had about what I thought would happen simply weren’t true.

I look back on that chapter as a real adventure and an exciting opportunity. But I have also come to realize that it’s such as gift enjoy being my own boss.

I have been self-employed for 27 years, and it has been the perfect fit for me. I love the freedom of setting my own schedule, of waking up when I want to and traveling when I want to. I have colleagues who work harder than I do, and they have the income to show it! But that’s the beauty of being a self-employed spiritual business owner – you get to choose.

I cherish the ability to design the kind of day I want and choose the clients I work with. I constantly remind myself of what a blessing self-employment is.

To this day, I have the freedom to express myself however I want. I have the luxury of selecting the shirt that makes me the happiest, and I wouldn’t change that for the world!

If you run a spiritual business and want to learn how to learn how to be your own boss, my Healer’s Circle program is starting and open for you to join!